August 22- ” Now, give me your cross I will hold it for you”

This was the thoughest day of my meditations or visions.

I was resting in the bath tub,  I closed my eyes to relax, then when I felt the presence of Jesus, I said, -“forgive me Lord, I have no clothing!” then he said, ” I created you”I closed my eyes again and I felt my heart in sorrow, affliction and guiltiness.  Then, I saw what would be  a fast movie that was being played on front of me, very fast.

First, I saw  all my sins, different sizes if you want to call them little sins and big sins.  I cried and said, – I thought I was already forgiven and ‘that was a long time ago”

Second, I saw faces people that I knew and I know, then, I started  feelings that I didn’t know what was those feelings, weren’t good. I started crying, I heard the word ‘purgue’  they were  mostly feelings than visual images. And I said, ” that its not even me!”

Third, I started feeling those peoples feelings guiltiness, sadness, in satisfactions, regrets and many terrible feelings and I kept saying, “that’s not mine forgive him”, – Why do I’m feeling his feelings?”

The feelings that I was experiencing didn’t have end, nor consolation. Then, I saw myself laying down on a fabric in sorrow and Jesus was dragging me and he said, “I got you.”

I said to Jesus, –“Jesus, I already asked forgiveness for those sins and they were no so bad”  , but my sadness didn’t go away.

He said, “Grab your cross and follow me” but I couldn’t get up from the floor the feelings were too heavy I don’t know how to explain those feelings. I kept on saying, those are not mine, yes those were mine, but that wasn’t so bad.”

Then, I thought  of  opening  my eyes to make everything  stop.  But I said to myself,  “I never give up , I always face my consequences I want to know why do I’m experiencing this” so I barely could lift my head while I was being dragged and also because of the sadness and I said, “Please Lord, forgive me, forgive my sins and those that I don’t even know that I committed .”

All the sudden, my heart was at ease and my afflictions went away, and Jesus stopped dragging me, he  got closer to me, extended his hand and with love in his eyes said, “Give me your cross, I will carry it for you.“ 

After that vision, I did a long prayer, I felt little,  humbleness and almost shame on front of the Lord.  I did not only  realized that  when I prayed I ask about everything , but also  I realized that the  people I saw, was going through feelings that I didn’t have they were enduring.

Therefore, every time I started praying, I ask for forgiveness of sins that I ‘m not aware.

In conclusion, I felt Jesus loves us so much despite of all our wrong actions we do.

 

 

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